I'm back...or I'm quitting?

YoYo!
it seem like ... a lots of spider web here haha!
it's like decades ago since my last post. Partly its because I'm lazy ( i rather go facebook,insta or twitter)
but the main reason is because of I'M BUSY!! That's so true actually.
STPM's life isn't easy i tell you but since the exam ended and rather than sleeping till 2pm everyday. i should continue my blog right? or shouldn't me?

I don't know i should continue or not after so many years.
its hard to capture my feelings. my mood fluctuate quite frequent. i can be happy now and i can be crying the next seconds. i don't really wanna spam my blog with all the negative things but sometimes i cant really control and i just hate myself. like a lot.

perhaps i will continue but mostly may be all those negative emo things. dafuq. haha!
i always trying to cheer myself and i succeed every time, so how am i to blog since i forget those feeling so damn fast??

i really hope i can record all my feelings and event at here but i'm just so lazy T T
my life seem meaningless somehow. i cant even manage my own blog. so sucks.

anyway i'm going to Melaka nexk week! or next next week!!
maybe i can wrote a bit about that trip and hope i can continue to blog about my life :)

gtg! (addicted to Line's I LOVE COFFEE game) buai~

Love?

Its been quite a time since i last update my blog.
it wasnt me dont want to update but Holiday is really that boring.
no plan. no outing. no FUN.
everyday stuck at home facing my lappy only, what can i write?

no interesting thing happen these few week,
but i guess its the time i should write something
not an event or an outing.
just some personal feelings that i wanna share out at here. my space.

for the first time ever, i felt very empty and i dont know to react.
what do i mean by empty? which mean, no one really in my heart now.
normally, i have crush or guys that i'm interest in but these few weeks,
i felt really EMPTY. i dont have any feelings to anyone.
i'm actually someone that cannot live without love ( kinda over say like this )
not really will die but i chase love non stop, i never stop loving someone.
and after i get rid of someone, the next day i found a new one. i am people like this, you may say i'm flower heart but if i really get into a relationship i'm serious about it.

but recently, i felt really EMPTY.
i guess i can live without love now LOL
or maybe i dont wanna fall in love again. just for now. i wanna concentrate studies and i maybe can find someone better in Uni or College.

so i wanna share out my personal feelings and experience or stories that i know. which is related to LOVE thingy.

so....

i start to understand what is Love since i'm 13 years old. yup, Form 1 but i didn't felt anyone before, which mean i have crush only ( no BF TT ). those were the time i'm so damn PURE.
Pure than anyone in nowadays 13 years old KIDS.
to my surprise, most of them already lost their first love, first kiss or date or maybe Virginity. OMG
== i start to approach Sex during form 3 and really know What it sex during form 5,
i don't know i'm really that pure or kids nowadays learn things fast like that.
and marriage in the years or 15/16 ?!!!!!!!!!
WORLD nowadays? KIDS nowadays?

in western countries, i believe virginity may be nothing for a teen but in asian, i guess virginity is still important ba?????
at least for me it is. maybe my cousin and parents teach me well in these.

i'm still consider as pure now, okay....consider la not really pure ==
because in my opinion, girls should lose their virginity after they get married.
not after they're in a relationship. isn't that right?
my cousin told me that all boys are like that,
they will try their luck and ask for it (sex), if their partner let them then they go for it. if their partner dont want then some boys will respect the girls or some will argue for it. LOL?

this may be one of the reason i don't wanna PakTor now. i don't know how to handle it if my future bf ask for this== i will sure reject but those awkward moment. /.\ YERRRRRRRR X BOLEH TAHAN!!!
i can accept kiss and hug only. hahahaha! so closed minded. but i'm just protecting myself.
no one know what will happen after those things happen right? who will take that Responsibility? not that you will get married with me after i'm pregnant and that means you take that responsibility already! how about future life? get married because of responsibility then after your child grown up, you divorce because you dont love each other any more ?
it doesnt mean that 2 people get married because of love will NOT divorce but isnt marriage are meant for adults? MATURE adults. those that plan for their future. their kids and education and long long more.
not for 2 teenager that get married for responsibility. right??

Sorry, i'm too far from my topic already /.\
tomorrow continue! i'm tired already! should sleep now!! sorry for typo because i just type out based on my feelings~!

Good Night!

P/S ; i changes my blog templates and background already! Like it? :D
Christmas FEEL ♥ 

Exam x3 Test x3

last week, this week and next week exam!!
want to shout SIEN ah!

today ngam ngam finish pp exam. now dying in my bed ~.~

update a bit about the building that terbakar at puteri there...

 at first i thought is rain jor==
my father ask me faster get into the car cause wanna rain jor hahaha

 then i realise its not cloud its smoke!!

 still a building under renovation! o.o

 see see see......

 most funny things is, all people watch take picture only. no one really care about the fire ~.~

 and the firemen arrive after....30 minutes i guess? and after i back home, bath and online awhile, my friend say " the fire has been put off" i'm like... LOL? after so long only put off ah? people die long long time already lo

pei fu malaysia firemen ~.~

and now updates about yan yan :D

 learning how to stand!!!

 SUCCESS! hehe

 while she learn how to stand i learn how to stuck whole chapter 3 into my brain== and i realise i fail ! today test really die die die

 i guess she wanna tell me that nothing is impossible!
she learn how to drive now! haha

 my economy test. shit. 48 only == why my economy so sucks ah? haih! HELP!

 20 marks i get half only ! but at least not 0 ==

 tomorrow going ioi! watch movie and dinner with 38 gang ! yay!!!!! happy :D
i love you guys really!

long time didn't felt so happy already!
chit chat and tell out my secret to you guys!
never been so true before. i mean i no need to hide or scare you all will unhappy. even i talk bout some sensitive issue, you all don't mind also. :D felt so free! and for the first time ever i can tell so many people bout someone that i like >< and always support me! argh! love you all ah!

awaits you tmr! but got meeting haih! :[

will updates soon! :D

lazy to write bout the mission laaaaaaaa.... next post ba!
buaiiiiii!

a very short post

my blogging mood suppose to be ON today. really wanna write a lot! and update my event and most important my FEELINGS! but......xiao lin & his bf will look at my blog, so i paiseh update haha!
just kidding xP

its because tomorrow will got another event! so i wanna wait for tomorrow pictures first :p
and my homework haven't done yet !!

Pengajian Am : DYING! i don't know what is this and why sejarah and karangan is related ._.
Pengajian Peniagaan : Still okay but without my reference book, i'm dead! T.T
Ekonomi : i love it at first but then i absent for one day classes, i don't know where am i. trying to catch up back >.<
Prinsip Perakaunan : Always my favourite but this teacher kinda... ehem, i miss my account teacher! TT
MUET : well, i score pretty well in listening and speaking, but writing and reading .......... i'll try my best TT

　　　　

how come these few subjects can be so hard ?!!!
exam coming soon..... don't know how to die already. jia you bah!
ＧＡＭＢＡＴＥＨ :D

P/S : HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ALAN CHO CHUN HOW ! xP i don't know got spell wrong your name or not ! but wish you happy birthday and have a blast :D